It’s surprising how little time passes between the moment you decide to tell the truth, and the moment the world legally declares you insane. Within seconds people start to doubt you, minutes and they blame you and only days and they will pity you until they see no other option. So now I find myself in a room. Completely white, no windows and a door made to blend in with the walls. A camera somewhere, I suspect, and in the middle of the room there’s one chair. ‘Solitary confinement’, they say, but it’s not. I’m not alone.
It’s quiet. No people around, no social obligations, no small talk… God, I hate small talk. Small talk is the language of people shrouded in their own ignorance. Ignorance is bliss, they say. No. Ignorance is what got us here in the first place. Here being this little white room that was, is and will be again my temporary, little, oblivion free world. My world where unseen cameras and unseen eyes pierce through my skull, attempting to see what’s inside my mind, but never really seeing the beautiful destruction that’s working its way outside… Yes it’s quiet, for now.
This always happens. The more I think of it the more I see myself as the idiot I am. It’s not that I’m lying, really. It’s just that the truth is too much. The first time I told the truth right away. I was young and naïve, they said. Then I tried telling it when I was older and when that didn’t work I tried somewhere. Somehow I always end up telling. Like I said, stupid. Things don’t change.
i found a single black spot on the white wall. i’ve been imagining it to change shape, grow, shrink bend or anything actually, but after staring for what seems like forever, nothing changed. It’s been grabbing my attention for the last… I already lost track of time. It doesn’t matter. It can’t take too long anyway. Last time it was 5 days, before that it was 20, now… 7? I’m going for 7. i hear someone agree. 7 is a good number.
Someone sat on my chair I know it Nobody else in the room, they say but someone sat in my chair. Normally they don’t give me a chair but now they do and someone steals it. I can’t believe I’m getting frustrated over a chair. You should be, they say, you have the right to be, they say. Let it out, they say, why won’t you let us it out, they say.
Day 5, day 6:
they say it’s time and 7 makes perfect so it’s now or never. Back to the end and backto the start maybe. The new me will know more, be wiser and don’t say the truth. Someone is sitting on my chair, he stands up. He fights. He destroys. The truth is out.
It’s done. As I see the ruin all around, my conscience is clear and my heart is satisfied. They thought I was crazy, that the voices were fake and that there was no chair. Only when the white walls crumbled they saw the real truth beyond what they thought was ‘normal’. Inside I know that they will never believe me and I know they’ll always put me behind the white walls where it can’t reach me for ‘my own good’. With a clean slate I can step outside and I can witness the beautiful chaos while telling them, ‘I told you so.’
Day 4: Imagine you’re unable to leave a room for the next 7 days. Chronicle each of the days using max. 100 words for each day.
Yeah… I know, the whole point of a challenge is the whole 30 consecutive days thing… Well I didn’t quite feel the 3rd challenge so I finally decided to just skip to the fourth one xD 7 Days of insanity, I hope this ‘diary’ confused you as much as it did me.